When You Don’t Know if You’re Moving Or Not

There are, unfortunately, times in life when you don’t even know if you are moving or not.

It reminds me of a few lines of Dr. Seuss. “I’m sorry to say so, but sadly it’s true, that bang-ups and hang-ups can happen to you…”

We are indeed in that dreaded place, “the waiting place, for people just waiting.”

If you do not know these Dr. Seuss references you must read Oh, the Places You’ll Go!

***When you purchase through Amazon links on my website, I do collect advertising fees. But seriously, at least check that book out at the library.***

This is where our family currently sits. We do not know if we are moving or not once this school year ends.

My husband is in another graduate school program this year, and when the year is over, everything is in the air. That is how the military likes to keep us, like a released helium balloon. Where will we end up? Who knows? Nobody.

Our fate will probably not be decided until March or so, and then they will wait and make some fancy formal announcement by May. Then Alan will be expected to report in July.

Has this happened to you? I mean, anyone who has been unemployed or up for a big transfer, or served in the military has dealt with this sort of thing.

It could not come at a more nerve-racking time. Our oldest son is preparing to start college next fall. He wants to stay within a reasonable distance to us. Most colleges have deadlines. Therefore, he has to identify about five different colleges in five different regions to ensure he has one semi-close to where we will be.

Then there is also the possibility that we could stay here just one more year and not move after all.

If my husband takes a short job, that will solve the college problem. We also would stay in our same house. It is not worth the upheaval to move for only a year.

Moving when the children were young was big, but the problem grows with our family. With older children, these moves are excruciatingly difficult.

Oh but hey! We could also end up staying here for four or five more years!

I feel like that is a long shot though. There are not all that many long term jobs available here.

How we deal with all of this uncertainty:

I say “we” because all six of us are having to cope with the uncertainty of whether or not we will have to move. As it draws closer to go or no-go time, this problem will be more and more of a humdinger!

At this point we are still ten months out from a potential moving situation. I still feel that the one year extension is a strong possibility. I am not stressing yet, believe it or not.

We have had a few other years like this one, where we did not know if a move was coming or not.

I will not be too stressed about it until we are about four months out from a move, then I will be downright stress paralyzed.

To deal with the stress, I will probably do a lot of sitting on my porch drinking coffee, watching the birds, watching comedy shows, taking bubble baths, and praying like crazy.

I will wake up and pray about this. Then I will deliver my youngest son to school, wave good-bye, and pray about this some more. I will unload the dishwasher praying about this.

You will see me driving around town, staring straight ahead, praying about this. Then I will miss my turn because I will be planning an entire new life in Alabama that may not even happen instead of focusing on where I am supposed to be driving and turning.

Then I will chastise myself for not focusing while driving.

I will call my mom and whine about this. While walking with my friend Amy, I will strategize on what we will do if plan A, B, or C or D happens.

In fact, all of my friends and family will be more relieved than I am when Alan finally has orders because they will not have to listen to me talk about it anymore. (Sorry, guys.)

Oh, and I will have a useless tentative plan drawn up in my head for whatever I believe are the three most likely scenarios for whether we stay or move here or there:

I will find us a home in three different states that we probably cannot even afford. Schools, colleges, and churches will be researched.

It will all be a total waste of time honestly. The Army will send us to an elusive fourth place I had not really considered because I do not want it.

We have been through this a few times before.

Actually Useful Things to Do While You Wait to Find Out if You are Moving or Not:

-Begin decluttering each room again.

-Donate things and join the community yard sale to get rid of excess stuff. The more things you own, the harder the move. That is a fact. (You can read my decluttering for moving posts here and here.) If you end up not moving, at least your house will be neater.

-Make sure you have a file with each kid’s updated shot records.

-Take comfort in reading the Bible as close to every morning as possible. There is actually research that shows the difference this can make in your life. But the best evidence is the change you will see in your overall attitude towards life when you try it out.

When you know your life is in God’s hands, it makes this whole stressful life thing feel more restful and doable.

I cannot say that you will not have stress if you pray and draw closer to Go, but I promise God can help you weather the stress.

This is my main strategy for this year’s possible move: daily centering myself in God’s word and trust Him with the rest. At the end of the day, this is all out of my hands anyway.